Daily Dilemma

I used to write a lot. I simply turn my laptop on and words come flowing harmoniously as I type every letter to form each words to complete an article, an essay or a poem. But, that was long ago…

I used to take photographs all the time. I simply point my lenses and shoot. Post-process every picture afterwards and share them online. But, that was also long ago…

Though I can’t write much more often now nor take countless photos in a day, I still have not ended my hopes in getting to better days where I can do these things I’m passionate about without any materialistic dilemma.

I am a writer without a laptop but I have pen and paper and that “notes” application in my phone where I can type the words my brain urges to throw into thin air at the most random moments of the day.

I am not really a photographer without the perfect camera but I do have a camera phone that I bring along to take the images I can keep. I also have this thing called “memory” where I store all the beautiful picturesque scenes I have encountered that no one could ever see but could only hear about from me.

Although I don’t have the best of everything right now, I am still grateful for having the tools I need to get by.

I used to have the best things but I got too comfortable and forgot to take care of them. Now, I have the little things that help me continue my passion and this time, I’m not going to take them for granted.

 

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#MissingTheMountains

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Photo taken by Gine Severano

Okay… If there’s one thing I am feeling right now, that’d be: I’m missing the mountains badly.

I have taken a break on hiking since the last few days of February when my friend Gine and I spent the not-so-weekend in the Mountain Province (here in the Philippines), in Maligcong, Bontoc to be specific. Since that is my recent hike, I might make a post about it.

I miss the adrenaline rush and the sense of freedom hiking gives me. The vulnerability and strength I feel as I take every step towards the summit.

I just miss the outdoors – the raw smell of grass and dung, the breeze of fair weather days as well as the humidity the scorching sun gives off at noon time, the friendly faces of people I come across with and those dull eyes from the snob ones, the sound of the swaying trees as if they are dancing with the wind and the animals that sing along, the sweat that arises from my skin as my heart pumps so fast and my lungs strives hard for oxygen, the afterglow I get from all the strenuous activity which is fun and relaxing at the same time – all these, I simply miss.

Now, I quite feel heavy as I can barely run from end-to-end. And yes, I am sick mainly because I lack sleep and get more stressed than ever.

I need a sense of release from all what’s happening though I’m feeling positive every passing day.

I need a break, I suppose, but not this kind of break – not a real sick leave. I want to go somewhere. I want to feel the Earth and set my mind straight. I want to meditate. I want to go to the mountains again.

The mountains I call home.

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Where do I start from here?

11th of May at exactly 10 in the evening, I’m writing the first post for this blog and I hope I don’t screw up this time.

I used to create blogs in the past – okay, during my teenage years – when I was so dumb and naive. My blog sites before were nothing but a scrapbook of love notes and what-nots, simply a journal of a teenage girl who repeatedly got dumped by the people she likes.

Oh well, I’m hoping for a change this time. A 20-something me versus the teenage years of my life. Let’s see where this goes.

And yes, this is gonna be the final personal blog I’m gonna create.

 

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